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N.M.E. Sales Guy

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N.M.E. Sales Guy
Customer Service Art.png
Artwork of the N.M.E. Sales Guy in Kirby: Right Back at Ya!.
Details
First episode Kirby Comes to Cappy Town
Last episode Kirby 3D
Main role Secondary villain
Other appearance(s) Kirby Mass Attack (cameo)
Similar characters eNeMeE
Voice actor(s) Dan Green (English)
Banjō Ginga (Japanese)
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Welcome to Night Mare Enterprises, King Dedede. How can I assist you?
— N.M.E. Sales Guy in Kirby Comes to Cappy Town

The N.M.E. Sales Guy[1] is the public face of Night Mare Enterprises and a recurring secondary villain in the anime series Kirby: Right Back at Ya!. He is usually seen only on a television screen from within Castle Dedede, appearing whenever King Dedede wants to order a monster or other product from the company. The N.M.E. Sales Guy is a humanoid figure who wears a business suit and gives off a professional demeanor. Despite this, it is clear that he wishes only to exploit King Dedede for as much money as he can, and try to defeat Kirby using N.M.E.'s monsters.

Appearance

I may be shrimpy, but I'm a whale of a salesman!
— N.M.E. Sales Guy in Fright to the Finish

The Sales Guy is humanoid in appearance. He has a long chin and pale gray skin. His hair color is purple and green, and he wears large orange sunglasses. His suit is dark blue with a bright orange shirt and pink tie. In the very last episode of the show, Fright to the Finish, he is revealed to have short, Kirby-like feet with no legs. He is first seen fully in the episode The Pillow Case (in the Japanese version), but the fact that he is wearing a kimono and that he is on a pillow make it seem that he is sitting as opposed to standing.

Personality

The N.M.E. Sales Guy serves as the public face of Night Mare Enterprises, and as such, tends to keep a professional demeanor as much as is possible, even when he is being directly insulted by his customers. He tends to do his job well, as he is often able to talk King Dedede into buying extra peripherals and charging him premium rates for various services. As such, he is able to keep King Dedede under a perpetual debt which is ultimately never paid off before N.M.E. is destroyed in the final episode. Despite his professional demeanor, The N.M.E. Sales Guy secretly (and sometimes not-so-secretly) mocks King Dedede for his gullibility and his foolishness, once referring to him in the flashback in The Fofa Factor as "King Sucker". Due to the King's obstinance against paying his debt, the N.M.E. Sales Guy often has to refuse him service, or send in a monster to forcefully repossess Dedede's assets.

Despite doing a good job at selling monsters, the N.M.E. Sales Guy tends to falter when it comes to his real ambition of destroying Kirby and the other Star Warriors. He often hatches plans to entrap the pink puffball, the most notable examples of which are plans to have Kirby transported directly to N.M.E. headquarters to be destroyed by a horde of monsters which are attempted in Abusement Park and Scare Tactics - Part II. Both times, these plans nearly work, but are thwarted due to Mike Kirby's singing in the former case, and Meta Knight in the latter. The N.M.E. Sales Guy's worst humiliation comes when he is tricked by Knuckle Joe into sending Masher to Dream Land only to have the monster destroyed when Knuckle Joe betrays him. Despite his usual role as a villain, the N.M.E. Sales Guy does have a sense of fair play. In The Kirby Quiz, he serves as an impartial host, even disqualifying King Dedede and Escargoon when it is proven that they cheated in the last round.

Filmography

The following is a complete list of all of N.M.E. Sales Guy's appearances in Kirby: Right Back at Ya!, along with other information regarding his role in each episode:

N.M.E. Sales Guy's appearances in Kirby: Right Back at Ya!  
Episode Image Role Selected quote Notes
Kirby Comes to Cappy Town
E1 Salesguy.png
Secondary character "Just give it time, your Highness, and I guarantee that little shrimp will grow on you."
A Blockbuster Battle
E2 Salesguy.png
Secondary character "Now that we know your opponent is Kirby, all our monsters have new improved attack powers." *gets attacked by monsters* "See what I mean?"
Kirby's Duel Role
E3 Salesguy.png
Secondary character "No problemo, Triple D! We always give credit where credit is due!"
Dark and Stormy Knight
E4 Salesguy.png
Secondary character *chuckles* "Sorry, your Majesty, but our contract states that Kracko can't be sent backo!"
Beware: Whispy Woods!
E5 Salesguy.png
Secondary character "Well according to my calculations, your Night Mare Enterprises account shows an outstanding unpaid balance of 19 million in change, see?"
The Fofa Factor
E9 Salesguy.png
Secondary character "Well, King Sucker's back to get his pocket picked again."
The Big Taste Test
E11 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character *chuckles* "Just take a look at page 250."
Escargoon Squad
E12 Salesguy.png
Secondary character "Overdue bills! King Dedede owed us big time and this was the only way we could collect. Ta ta!"
Cappy New Year
E13 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "That's Sasuke, our firework monster!"
The Pillow Case
E14 Salesguy.png
Secondary character "Thanks to our friend King Dedede, all of Cappy Town will be dreaming exactly what we want them to."
The Thing About the Ring
E17 Salesguy.png
Secondary character "Just what the doctor ordered, eh, D-Man?"
Here Comes the Son
E19 Salesguy.png
Secondary character "There's a little extra service charge for that special upload, King."
Dedede's Snow Job
E20 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "We deal mostly in monsters, not home appliances, but I think we may just have something that'll do the job." It should be noted that N.M.E. later does deal in home appliances, with examples being the pieces of SlicerDicer in Cooking Up Trouble and the CFC-emitting air conditioner devices in A Sunsational Puzzle.
Hour of the WolfWrath
E26 Salesguy.png
Secondary character "Oops. I guess I forgot to mention that! WolfWrath needs to set fires to get the strength for its attacks."
The Flower Plot
E27 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "Oh Whispy sure has weird taste in girlfriends. That boy's been in the woods too long!"
Labor Daze
E28 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "It's the ultra-cool hyper-industrial factory starter kit you ordered, D-Meister!"
A Spice Odyssey
E29 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "That's an appetizing proposition. Sit back while we cook up a cook!"
Hatch Me If You Can
E30 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "With Kirby so attached to that cute little monster, he won't want to fight a big ol' bad one! When the giant Galbo attacks, Kirby's history!"
Abusement Park
E31 Salesguy.png
Secondary character "It's like he's scratching a chalk board! I can't take it! I'm sending Kirby back!"
A Dental Dilemma
E32 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "Good luck, Big D!"
Junk Jam
E33 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "We'll be happy to deep-six the dumping as soon as you pay us what you owe us, Sire."
A Recipe for Disaster
E34 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character *chuckles* "Cobgoblin, you're up! Now you go take care of Kirby!"
The Kirby Derby - Part I
E35 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "With its deluxe five thousand horsepower engine and turbo-charged side-mount rockets, this machine can outrun any racecar!"
The Kirby Derby - Part II
E36 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "It seems that Kirby has mastered control of his Starship." Appears only in the Japanese version. As such, his dialogue is translated from Japanese.
Watermelon Felon
E37 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "Hey! What do you think you're doing?!"
A Novel Approach
E38 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "Per your request, it's my great pleasure to introduce...the author of Pappy Pottey!"
Escar-Gone
E39 Salesguy.png
Secondary character "Erasem is one of the tinier monsters in our inventory. Try searching the castle with a magnifying glass."
Monster Management
E40 Salesguy.png
Secondary character "How's it going? Disastrously, I trust!"
Prediction Predicament - Part I
E41 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "Thousand years away, hmm? I don't know about our little friends, but I for one am feeling kind of impatient. What do you say we speed up the process just a little bit?"
Scare Tactics - Part I
E45 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "You're way over your limit, boys!"
Scare Tactics - Part II
E46 Salesguy.png
Secondary character "It didn't work, D! I'll have to send a monster to carry Kirby back here by force!"
Pink-Collar Blues
E47 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "It just so happens we have exactly what you're looking for! Stand by."
Tourist Trap
E48 Salesguy.png
Secondary character "As far as tourism goes, Sire, here's my opinion. You might as well rename Dream Land "Snoozeville"!"
Cartoon Buffoon
E49 Salesguy.png
Secondary character "I just re-read our contract, King D, and it states that the show has to be of professional quality!"
Don't Bank on It
E50 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character *laughs* "I forgot to tell you! We made the dolls, like you ordered, but there was a side effect. A psychic bond develops between you and the dolls. Eventually, anything that happens to the dolls is also experienced by you!"
Kirby Takes the Cake
E51 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "You see, he has trouble distinguishing between friend and foe. Poor little fella gets confused sometimes. I'd wanna handle this one with care, Big D!"
Snack Attack - Part I
E52 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "So, they sprung you out of the slammer, Sire. It must have been a bum wrap. I can't imagine you stealing anything."
Snack Attack - Part II
E53 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character *laughs* "I tried to sell you more fighting monsters, but you decided to pinch your pennies! Now you're stuck with the junk, Big D!"
Sweet and Sour Puss
E55 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "The monster invades its opponents and takes away their ability to get angry or fight back."
Dedede's Pet Threat
E56 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "I'd love to help you out, but we've got a no-return policy once they've multiplied, unless of course we can work something out."
A Half-Baked Battle
E57 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "Fine, but be careful, Big D! This monster could be hard for you to stomach, too!"
eNeMeE Elementary
E58 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "We'll take care of all the details for you, D-Man! eNeMeE Academy is a first-class facility with a super-strict curriculum! We'll whip those kids into shape in no time."
The Meal Moocher
E59 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "Okay, but the crustacean I've got in mind is monster-sized!"
Crusade for the Blade
E60 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "Very interesting. If this space girl is as tough as you say she is, I think I better send the big guy!"
Fitness Fiend
E61 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "Don't worry your little head! It's not going to be cheap, but I happen to have a sure-fire way to a slimmer and trimmer you!"
Something to Sneeze At
E63 Salesguy.png
Primary character "Yes, it's a proven scientific factoid. Cold germs hate to infect dim-witted creatures because they spend days in an empty head with nothing to do. It gets pretty boring up there, so they leave to find somebody smarter." *coughs* This marks the N.M.E. Sales Guy's first leading role in an episode.
The Kirby Quiz
E64 Salesguy.png
Primary character "Guess I've forgotten how crummy Kirby's caterwauling could be! Is everybody okay?"
The Chill Factor
E66 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "D, I can't send you any more monsters 'til your bill's paid up, but I can send ya somethin' hot to tide you over."
The School Scam
E67 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "Sounds like you could use some new blood in that student body of yours, to challenge the children."
Delivery Dilemma
E68 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character *chuckles* "You're joking, right?"
Waddle While You Work
E72 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "It's a simple case of economics, D-Man! In the business world, you're what we call: a dead-beat!"
Dedede's Raw Deal
E73 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "But D-Man! This is high tech! The equipment costs a fortune!"
Caterpillar Thriller
E74 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "You just summon the monster from the island where it lives! Of course, Mosugaba won't come for just anybody!"
Fossil Fools - Part I
E75 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "Meet Doctor Moro! He's a specialist in this kind of thing. Happy experimenting!"
Dedede's Monsterpiece
E77 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "Sorry, D, we're fresh out of artists, but I could send you a monster!"
Right Hand Robot
E78 Salesguy.png
Secondary character "All I'm tryin' to tell you, Big-D, is that you'll get a kick out of those buttons on its shell!"
Goin' Bonkers
E79 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "That's a ridiculous idea! Who ever heard of making a giant gorilla monster?"
Power Ploy
E80 Salesguy.png
Secondary character "Believe me! I hear where you guys are coming from, and if you care to fill out a complaint form, I'd be happy to pass it on to my superiors. Pleasing our customers is Night Mare Enterprises' top priority!"
A Trashy Tale
E81 Salesguy.png
Secondary character "Thought it might be a nice gesture! Seeing as you were sweet enough to send us your trash, we thought we'd send you some of ours!"
Cooking Up Trouble
E82 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "By the way, Three D. What's all this I hear about the men folk in Cappy Town taking up cooking?"
Teacher's Threat
E83 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "Well you see Chip's not an honest-to-badness monster per se, but we knew he could teach, so we hired him and told him to act like a monster."
A Sunsational Puzzle
E85 Salesguy.png
Secondary character "As you can see, the hole they made is a real whopper! UV rays are pouring through even as we speak!"
A Chow Challenge
E86 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "We're doing our best, but Night Mare Enterprises deals in monsters, not in groceries. It may take a little time, Triple-D!"
Shell-Shocked
E88 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "Sorry, Loony-Goon, just tryin' to keep the mood light! And to cheer you up, I got a little surprise!"
Tooned Out
E89 Salesguy.png
Secondary character "You better get movin', Triple-D! A hole opened up in our network's schedule for the day after tomorrow!"
Born to Be Mild - Part I
E90 Salesguy.png
Secondary character "Hello, there! Welcome, Cappy race fans! Welcome to the opening day at Dream Land's beautiful new DDD Speedway! This exciting event is brought to you by Night Mare Enterprises: purveyor of fine monsters for all occasions including birthdays, anniversaries, engagement parties, baby showers--"
Born to Be Mild - Part II
E91 Salesguy.png
Secondary character "Well, folks, that's the end of the race and the end of the raceway, too! Thanks for watching and have a pleasant day! See ya!"
Hunger Struck
E92 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "Hey there, Big D! What's shakin'? ...You two posin' for a statue?"
D'Preciation Day
E93 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "I'll do the best I can, Your Majesty..."
Cowardly Creature
E94 Salesguy.png
Secondary character "No! It's very cute and cuddly, and it's got a name. We like to call it Phan Phan!"
Frog Wild
E95 Salesguy.png
Tertiary character "If that frog's around, I bet it's causing Kirby's naughty behavior."
Air-Ride-in-Style - Part I
E96 Salesguy.png
Primary character "Kabu's sort of a hospital for Warp Stars and wounded Star Warriors. Like a big recovery room."
Air-Ride-in-Style - Part II
E97 Salesguy.png
Secondary character "I must say I'm quite impressed with our pudgy pink pal! Sure, he's the enemy and all, but for a little guy, he's got a lot a' guts!"
Cappy Town Down
E98 Salesguy.png
Secondary character "Get rid of Meta Knight's battleship for us, and we'll repair your transmitter at no charge and throw in a free monster!"
Combat Kirby
E99 Salesguy.png
Primary character "Bye-bye. It's always been a real pleasure double-dealing with you, Your Majesty." *laughs*
Fright to the Finish
E100 Salesguy.png
Primary character "I may be shrimpy, but I'm a whale of a salesman!"
Kirby 3D
E101 Salesguy.png
Secondary character "My profoundest apologies, King Dedede and Lord Escargoon. We'll send over our latest, most miserable model for a discount price of... two billion D-Bills!"

Trivia

  • The Japanese version of the anime features the text "HOLY NIGHTMARE" written above the N.M.E. Sales Guy on the television screen in Castle Dedede, referring to the Japanese name of Night Mare Enterprises. This is removed in the English dub, and all subsequent dubs based upon it, with the exception of Kirby 3D.
  • In Kirby Mass Attack, the N.M.E. Sales Guy makes a cameo appearance in the Game Over screen for the sub-game Strato Patrol EOS. The song that plays on this screen is called "Service Song" in the Music Player.
    • In the Japanese version of the game, the words "HOLY NIGHTMARE" are displayed in blue text on top of him, just like the anime. This is removed in the international versions.

Gallery

Character sheets

Screenshots

Other

Names in other languages

Language Name Meaning
Japanese カスタマーサービス
Kasutamāsābisu
Customer Service
French Service Clientèle Customer Service


References